I watch movies so you don’t have to.
And also because I enjoy them considerably.
Summer is the season of blockbusters. Hollywood studios spend millions of dollars in production and marketing to entice us all to take a trip to the local cinema and watch childish humor, unrealistic action, and overwrought drama. And I love it.
Like many other people who work in film criticism and appreciation, I love a meticulously-crafted independent film that has considerable artistic merit. That being said, I also love to see what Hollywood can produce when it pulls out all the stops: the blockbuster shows the true power of the film industry to push the boundaries of imagination and technology.
Some may argue that the blockbuster is losing its luster, but there’s no denying the appeal of the big-budget summer movie. The summer itself conjures up images of hot days, disposable income, romantic flings, and lots of time to waste: a perfect fit for the film industry who provides air conditioning and a great way to spend that time and money with your romantic flings.
Let me help you pick the good from the bad. Below, you’ll find a week by week breakdown of the standout and sleeper hit for each set of releases. For the movies that I have already seen, I have included a diamond rating (out of 5: ♦♦♦♦♦) next to the film title. Films that have been creating a lot of buzz but are almost guaranteed to disappoint will be marked as notable omissions.
Do note that finding a standout and sleeper for every single week was incredibly difficult because of the weakness of some of the releases for some weeks. Forgive me if I was stuck picking some duds over the summer.
May 2
Standout: Iron Man (♦♦♦)
Sleeper: Son of Rambow (♦♦♦♦)
May 9
Standout: Speed Racer
Sleeper: Frontier(s) (♦♦♦)
May 16
Standout: The Chronicles of Narnia: Prince Caspian
Sleeper: Reprise (♦♦♦♦)
May 23
Standout: Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull (Indiana Jones is going to be in the top three films of the summer. Releasing anything in the same week is the epitome of bad business.)
May 30
Standout: Sex and the City: The Movie (The only reason I have this film as the standout is because nothing else of interest is coming out this weekend — I’m wary of this film’s quality.)
June 6
Standout: Kung Fu Panda
Sleeper: Mongol (♦♦♦)
Notable Omission: You Don’t Mess with the Zohan
June 13
Standout: The Happening
Sleeper: The Incredible Hulk
June 20
Standout: Get Smart
Sleeper: The Love Guru
June 27
Standout: WALL·E
Sleeper: Wanted (Sure, this looks like an absolutely fantastic film, but betting against Pixar is not a smart thing to do. WALL·E is the in the top three films of the summer.)
July 4
Standout: Hancock
Sleeper: The Wackness (♦♦♦♦)
July 11
Standout: Hellboy II: The Golden Army (If this film is anything like the first one, it will be an instant classic that nobody will go see because they’re too busy watching that ridiculous Eddie Murphy movie coming out this week.)
July 18
You want to hear predictions? Well, here you go: The Dark Knight will not only be the best (quality-wise) blockbuster this summer, but it will also be highest grossing film of the season. In fact, I’m going to say it’ll be the second highest-grossing film of the year. And that Heath Ledger gets nominated for an posthumous Academy Award.
How’s that for expectations?
July 25
Standout: The X-Files: I Want To Believe
Sleeper: Step Brothers
August 1
Let’s pretend this weekend doesn’t exist. Because there’s clearly nothing even remotely tolerable opening. (Unless, of course, you can tolerate Brendan Fraser, but that’s definitely a skill I haven’t acquired just yet.)
August 8
Standout: Pineapple Express
Sleeper: The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants 2
August 15
Standout: Nothing Is Private (♦♦♦♦♦)
Sleeper 1: The International
Sleeper 2: Tropic Thunder
August 22
Standout: Hamlet 2
Sleeper: Bangkok Dangerous
That’s all for now, I guess. I’ll write an update post at the end of August either apologizing for all the mis-picks in this post, or gloating about how I got everything right. Either way, there’s an exciting summer of movie-watching ahead.